Tonight the Bishop told me that he had read my blog and that he was starting to read the "Rowboat and Marbles" blog also. I was very happy to hear that, since I think Andrew does an amazing job of getting a very important message across in a logically organized way.
He also asked me if it would be OK for him to give the blog address to another member of my ward who might benefit from it. Of course I told him "Yes!! By all means! Give it to anyone and everyone who is willing to read it that you think could be helped by it!"
I also told him that I was going to be delivering my first step presentation at the SA meeting this Sunday, and that I'd love to carpool with whoever wanted to attend.
I don't think he has looked at the other blogs on our blogs list, but I did give him the address on Sunday. I told him that I got a lot out of all of them, both the blogs of addicts and the spouses of addicts. Reading about the pain, and also the recovery taking place is a powerful motivator to me; it helps me stay on that strait and narrow path. Also, I feel a lot of love here, and so many sweet personalities.
I have decided to work the 12 steps of the ARP and the SA programs concurrently. I am going to have monthly meetings with the bishop to discuss my progress and the step-work that I am doing, working through the ARP workbook and some other sources as well.
Have a very nice day, everyone!
I love how openly you are sharing your story. I had the thought to offer the same thing to my relief society pres. Not neccissarily to read my blog, but to offer several of the other blogs. At this stage I worry that if too many people in our ward knew about my husband he would stop going to church, and that is already hanging by a thread. I love your posts!
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comment, Letsy. I understand how difficult this is for you. I believe anonymity is good for the struggling addict. I certainly would not have wanted to be outed before I was ready. It sure makes fimding support difficult though, when you are the struggling spouse! Just think of all of the struggling addicts in any given ward who could be supporting each other, but don't, because they are too embarrassed to admit their addiction openly. It's going to get better, though. Because guys and gals like me are going to begin to be seen and heard!
ReplyDeleteThis is so great Dan! I wish my hishop was more into learning about recovery. When I saw him tor the first time and shared my heartache. He looked at me with a sad puppy face and said," I don't understand why men want to look at that stuff?"
ReplyDeleteI basically told him I wanted to go to support meetings and a therapist. He just nodded and agreed. I have been thinking about giving him books to read and a pass along card to the LDS Recovery and Healing Resources site. Problem is his time as a Bishop will be up soon. Yikes...wondering how to work that out.
Anyways, thanks for your courage and inspiration. If you come across any wives of the men at support group, you are welcome to share my blog.
Thanks, Sparrow! I guess some men really don't get it at all. I guess in a way that's good! Like Scabs says, sex addiction isn't as fun as it sounds. Anyway, I don't see anything wrong with giving him pass-along cards or books, except that books are expensive if you don't think he'll read it. Good luck, Sparrow, and thanks for commenting!
ReplyDeleteDan you inspire me daily! I love how you blog your mind. Sometimes people are too worried about who they'll offend etc but I appreciate your honesty and openess as well. I keep saying to myself that if I can just be blessed to help someone else along all the heartache and pain from my addictions will be worth it. I know in time Father will put those people in my path. :)
ReplyDeleteThanks, Jana! I really appreciate your encouragement. I think it's easier for me now because, while I haven't been recovering that long, I am confident because of what I've read that I'm finally on the right track. A few months ago I was hiding my addiction for all I was worth. An added benefit of coming out of hiding is the increased accountability. I'm pretty sure that Heavenly Father WILL put people in your path that you can help when you are ready. Keep up the good fight!
DeleteI would like to find a word better then congratulations. Amazing. Bravo. Right. Like it feels right. Smiles, Kandee
ReplyDeleteThanks, Kandee. The irony is that it's not so much what I'm doing as it is finally admitting what I can't do. It feels like something that is happening to me because I gave up the fight. I've struggled for about one minute (with lust, that is) in the last 76 days. So I just keep giving up. I do the easy stuff, and let Him take care of the hard stuff. Thanks, again!
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