We're All Special! Nobody is Special.

Hi friends, I'm back from Brazil.  I had an amazing, awesome trip and experience getting to know Brazil and its' people and those who were touched so much by the efforts of my son.  I'll write more about that a little later.

I miss Brazil terribly, it was so great! But I am happy to be back to the recovery scene.  It is clear to me that to maintain recovery, I must stay focused on the task.  For two weeks I had no blogs or blog reading, and no recovery meetings or phone contact with other recovering addicts.  I survived it, but there was some white-knuckling involved.  Just coming back to the blogs has got my head back in the right place.  There are lots of attractive people in Brazil, who wear less clothing than we do here!  I don't fault them for it.  It's hot down there in Recife!  Thankfully, there is a very active church scene, including a temple there.

Today my thinking turns to how special we are in the sight of God, and yet, how nobody is special.

In Mathew 7: 9-11 it says "Or what man is there of you, whom if his son ask bread, will he give him a stone?  Or if he ask a fish, will he give him a serpent?  If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father which is in heaven give good things to them that ask?"  Each of us is a child of God, treasured and loved by our heavenly parents.  He stands ready and willing to give us the good gifts that we seek.

On the other hand, In D&C 1: 31 it says "For I the Lord cannot look upon sin with the least degree of allowance."  Then, in the same vein we have Alma counseling his son, Corianton, in Alma 42: 30 "Do not endeavor to excuse yourself in the least point because of your sins, by denying the justice of God; but do you let the justice of God, and his mercy, and his longsuffering have full sway in your heart; and let it bring you down to the dust in humility."

For the past two weeks I have marveled at the blessings of the Gospel in the life of my family.  I met person after person who thanked me, very sincerely, for sending my son to Brazil.  I met three couples who were sealed in the temple as a result of his efforts.  I met several other people that he had baptized or taught, who were later baptized by others.  I met several who were re-activated, one of whom we found out had just received her endowment in the temple the day that we came to visit.  My son had been out of that area for a year.  What a special surprise!  A lot of people cried when we left.  And yet, in the middle of all of that blessing, if I let my eyes linger a little longer on something, or someone, or some part of someone, than I should have, I could feel the Spirit slipping away.  That saddened me.  No special privileges just because I'm in a foreign country with so many new things to see and experience!  No exceptions just because I'm out of my normal circle of support!  I realize how desperately I need the fellowship of others in recovery to help me keep my spiritual balance. 

Having made this confession, let me say that I did not think any really gross thoughts or lust in the sense that is typically thought of.  I did not act out.  One doesn't need to go that far to begin to lose the Spirit!  All it takes is letting my thoughts "appreciate" a person's beauty a little longer than I should.  A second look.   Pick up a book or magazine that "might" have something inappropriate and "poof", just like that, the Spirit leaves, even if I never see anything.  Lust is cunning, baffling, and powerful.  The Spirit is easily offended, and makes no exceptions.

Thankfully, there is repentance.  Often I am amazed at how quickly I can re-gain the companionship of the Spirit if I get down humbly and sincerely on my knees and re-commit!  If we ask for bread, will he give us a stone?  Nope.  He loves us.  He wants us to succeed.  It's not a set-up, intended to lead us to failure.  It is consistent love, perfectly applied.  We are special!  And yet, nobody is special.

Lots of love, Dan